My husband has been telling me for years not to buy our son shorts made of denim. I could not understand why. He is a boy. He is an active boy. His new clothes last an hour before getting stained. Shorts made of denim combine the airy freedom needed in summer heat, together with the durability and stain resistance of tough denim.
Fashion flash for all you people equally as challenged as me: shorts made of denim = jorts. Check out Urban Dictionary’s multitude of definitions here. Jorts are now the equivalent of wearing George Costanza’s sweatpants in public.
Confession: I have jorts and I wear jorts.
There. It’s out. I’m out.
I love jeans. I love shorts. Here is my Ode to Jeans. Why can’t jeans and shorts be combined fashionably?
Or maybe you are asking, “But Claire – your son is justified in needing rugged shorts. Are you also playing cops and robbers in the woods, or driving toy trucks up and down the driveway, or maybe even playing flashlight tag on weekend evenings?”
Of course not. None of the above. I like jorts because I
spill things on myself, sit down on things that will stain my rear end, wipe my hands on them while cooking … oh dear, this is not going well.
One pair of jorts went in the trash last week. They clearly were a denim version of short sweatpants, with the Seinfeld message: “I give up!” The second pair must also meet the trash can, now that I have publicly confessed to this fashion faux pas.
Ah, well. At least I have my denim capri pants to fall back on.
Wait! Whaaat? Capris are
a clear indicator of a middle aged women out of style?
Oh, Lord. Time for a glass of wine. Unless you want to tell me that THAT TOO is out of style?